For those of you who may not be familiar with his work, Bruce is the master of the soundbite. He's taken the more absurd lines, and made them not only memorable, but worth saving. "Hail to the King, Baby," and "Come Get Some" are probably my two favorites. The soundbite library, by the way, is reachable from Bruce's official website

Yep, I ended up at his official website. This marks a new day for me, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I sat and browsed a Star's website--and this wasn't like all those other times I've done the same thing. Why, you ask? Because Bruce isn't a cute chick. Cruising the website of a cute chick (starlet, Star, my wife or co-worker) seems to be what the web is all about. Everyone can have their own Brittany Spears site, it seems, and most people do. But I digress.

Not only did I cruise Bruce's website, I took the ultimate geek step: I wrote him an email. This is, of course, after I see on his web page that Bruce answers all of his own mail. Still, I wrote an email to someone that was famous, primarily, I suspect, because he is famous. Now, true, I did want to say that I actually LIKED McHale's Navy, and that I've enjoyed his work in general. But still--he doesn't really need to hear that. While I'm sure he appreciates fan mail, he doesn't know me from a wart on the Pope's ass. And why should he? I'm just your average VRU programmer and Unix sysadmin, waiting for the day when John Carpenter bangs on my door and says "Dude, you're the next Snake Plissken."

But I did write the email. And I sent it off, wondering if I'd get a reply.

Bruce is a man of his word--I not only got a reply, I got it the next day, which is pretty damn impressive, since he's probably on-site filming Evil Dead IV. Either that, or he's working on the post-production of Resident Evil, in which he stars.

A nice reply. I'd asked a stupid question about 'Isn't hollywood just filled with airheads and wingnuts?', and Bruce rightfully ignored this question, instead responding to a comment I'd made in response to an anti-noise pollution rambling he'd done. All I'd said was that motorcycles can be muffled--my VTR250 is about as quiet as my wife's Geo. Bruce's reply? "Amen, Brother - good on you!" I think the Kiwi sun has begun to bake the down-underisms into him, but hey, work is work.

Yeah, I wrote an email to a star and got a reply. And you know what? I'm still the same person I was before. I'm no closer to getting off my ass and writing the half-dozen scripts I have floating in my head. I'm only marginally closer to paying off my college loans. I'm still happily married to my beautiful wife, who despite nagging, is not interested in putting up a web page (Frogger is holding her interest these days, when she does go near her computer).

And Bruce? Bruce is the same guy. He got a rambling, pointless email from a fan in Minnesota--someone who has found his pages of advice to be simply wonderful sources of information. Bruce won't get a starring role because of my email, and he won't call me to be an extra in the next film he does in Minnesota. Hell, _I_ wouldn't call me to be an extra in a film I was doing in Minnesota. The last time I acted was years ago. Besides, I'd probably just end up being like Tom Arnold and playing myself (not that this is a bad thing -- I like Tom Arnold. See this page).

I take back what I said before. I actually am closer to getting off my ass and writing those scripts. I've taken to contributing to this web page more regularly, and I intend to keep doing so--since writing is writing, and the more I write, the closer I'll be to pumping out a full script. I've got some ideas on the plans I'd need to make to actually do my own film. I've got some more ideas on the first script, which is what I need to get done first. Once the script is written, THEN I can worry about funding.

Yeah. Bruce Campbell's a pretty cool guy. He got me really thinking about what I'd have to do to make a film...

Good on you, Bruce! Thanks!

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